By Caitlin Kamba
Voltaire had seen right when he said ‘God is a comedian playing to an audience that is too afraid to laugh’, hence, every Zimbabwean must loosen up and pay particular attention to Zimbabwe’s God given political comedian, Nelson Chamisa, than take him seriously and make politics so boring.
When it comes to the MDC Alliance leader (Chamisa), practical political satire is birthed as his ambitions, vision, promises, utterances and conduct rightly qualifies his mission as less to do with the dethronement of ZANU PF.
First, it was the bullet train rhetoric which MDC Alliance Secretary General, Douglas Mwonzora, then, dismissed as political banter, before he stepped back and let Chamisa expose himself as he remained stuck in ‘Alice Wonderland’ envisaging spaghetti roads and airports at every household in Zimbabwe.
Many then, attempted to have the MDC Alliance leadership rein-in Chamisa, but his ‘glory train’ to Alice Wonderland was unstoppable as his fans cheered his ‘foolhardy’ promises and sweet exaggerated nothings.
However, this time around the gods had to speak and send a spirit of defiance in the name of the doves that refused to take flight in demonstration of fake democracy that Chamisa stands for. A dove is an ordained symbol of peace which God himself used to depict the gentleness of his spirit as it descended on Jesus (Mathew 3 verse 16). Nothing about Chamisa has been gentle or sincere since his assumption to the MDC Alliance’s presidency. Needless, to mention that he cheated Morgan Tsvangirai on his deathbed, shoved Dr Thokozani Khupe away and trampled upon Elias Mudzuri. He got the advantage of having access to Tsvangirai and claimed that was when he got his anointment, but no one really knows what took place in that hospital room except the people he connived with then.
The flame of liberty on the other hand literary refused to ignite as Chamisa attempted to light it up in the full view of the public. Wasn’t that God communicating to us as a nation? We may play around with words, but not with God’s symbols of deity especially when hypocrisy is an art we are known to have mastered. Drama has always been Chamisa’s lifestyle ever since he took over from Tsvangirai. In a more dramatic way than Robert Mugabe’s fall at Harare International Airport months before his dethronement, Chamisa’s stage literally fell apart while he was addressing a rally in Hwange.
Chamisa’s end is definitely nigh; come the MDC Alliance congress the roof will figuratively collapse on him.
Of late he has been firing mayors chosen by the people, simply because they do not suit his personal wishes. Chamisa has the audacity to declare that most of his supporters (supporting the sacked mayors) as comprised of ZANU PF members. A demonstration is currently looming in Victoria Falls as people won’t have any of his intolerance and undemocratic tendencies.
One then wonders what he will say of Mudzuri and Mwonzora who have not made it a secret that they are waiting for the MDC Alliance congress in 2019 to see to it that they exorcise the demons bedevilling that party by way of contesting Chamisa. Surely, these guys have had enough of Chamisa’s anti-democratic climaxes. They have been reading the signs and no one can blame them especially looking at how things have been refusing to connect in Chamisa’s favour as he attempted to fake charisma and democracy.
Chamisa could have cheated the contestation by Mudzuri and Mwonzora had he accepted the offer to be the Official Leader of the Opposition in Parliament. Nevertheless, the boy is just too arrogant and arrogance will see his tenure short-lived at MDC Alliance. Perhaps his rivals Mwonzora and Mudzuri persuaded him to refuse the offer by President Mnangagwa to bar him from ring-fencing his reins ahead of the congress.
